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Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Santa Baby Contest Entry #3

What Wardrobe Malfunction?

Yes, here I go again”, she mumbled, striding into another “mandatory” company Christmas party, in yet another restrained, red velvet dress and tightly wound up-do.

“At least this is a new venue with an open bar!!” She said, giggling to herself as she traversed the icy stairs.

Work had consumed her to the point of agonizingly long days and sleepless nights of fitted worry. The nights she did manage to conquer a few hours of sleep in, were filled with nightmares of her repulsive boss trying to mount her while eating a leaky jelly doughnut before a staff meeting. Details, deadlines and full-blasted coffee were her only lovers these days; even her vibrator had been cursed at and thrown across the apartment for taking too freaking long at the task at hand.

At this point, she had really just needed to be taken advantage of by a bronzed man of questionable moral boundaries, fucked very harshly, and left with no long-term expectations. Sadly however, she knew at this party, she would more likely explode into a thin dusting of prudent, sexually frustrated, sparkly ashes, than to find a suitable man to fantasize about.

Well, at least she thought that, until she gazed upon the adept young bartender.

He was freaking marvelous! Those green eyes and perfectly unrestrained brown curls made her instantly turn gangly and pre-pubescent, she swore she could feel her dental headgear pulling her teeth back as she stood ogling him.

But, looking down, it hit her; she couldn’t have worn a more unflattering dress if she had tried! Dodging advances everyday at work made this unfortunate party apparel decision necessary. She hadn’t taken her coat off yet and decided to dart to the ladies room to survey the dowdy dress damage.

One step later, jelly doughnut walks up.

“You look marvelous as usual!” he spouts, while his wife death grips his arm, glaring at her.

“Well, the Salvation Army had a sale on all unflattering red velvet last weekend, soooo.”

Yes, doughnut, that WAS a joke, she thought, before continuing.

“Excuse me, I’m going to run to the ladies room”.

Looking in the mirror, she ridicules herself.

“I can’t believe I wore THIS!! There’s got to be some way of…... A-HA!!!!”

As she glanced around the ladies lounge she noticed the shimmering black cording with small tassels at each end holding the curtains back, if she stole it, she could make a cute belt to cinch her waist. It worked perfectly! She then let her hair down, dampened it a bit and scrunched it while kneeling under the hand dryer, praying no one came in. A quick air burst to her underarms and a few flips of her head later, she looked delicious! Two slaps on each cheek flushed her a little, and a fierce red stain was applied to her pouting lips. That matronly slit to the knee also got sexed up a bit by a quick tear to her thigh, secured with safety pins.

“Breathe, you’re a sex maven, just breathe”, she reassured herself out loud.

Wandering out of the restroom, cool as a cucumber in July, she stumbles on a cord right before the bar and her watching conquest.

“Unfortunately it appears maybe you DON’T need to visit me!” he said winking at her.

“Well, maybe you could pretend to water one down a bit,” she countered.

"Maybe then you’ll get lucky with me”.

His smile tore through her, taunting every womanly spot with a seducing confidence.

“Lucky for me, I am the boss tonight and I can get the bar covered while a sweep you off to a private balcony I spied earlier this evening.”

Once at the balcony, he notices the makeshift tieback belt.

“This looks better on you anyways” he quipped.

“It’ll look even better on the floor!” she advises.

Those sentences lead into a kiss that pushed her against the balusters and out of control. He slipped his hands up her skirt and was stopped by her Spanx.

She quickly covers her embarrassment with humor as she slips them off.

“Dammit man, you have no idea how sexy spanx can be if you pretend you never found them on a gal!”

Two seconds later, she experiences the welcome roughness of his hand pushing between her whetted lips, she gasped as she felt his longing for her and begged to taste him. When he could no longer take the skilled movements of her passionate tongue caressing and teasing him, he pulled her down to the marbled floor and thrust her onto him with a deep groan. She felt faint with pleasure and frantically guided him deeper until there was no escape for either one of them.

Their breath and tongues were in unison now, nothing was held back as they savored each other’s every move climaxing intensely. When the pulsing stopped, he flipped over beside her and ran his fingers through her hair. They both lay, staring at the stars, enjoying that certain giggle of complete sexual elation that was over taking them at the moment.

“This can’t be the last time I feel this with you” he whispered.

“I’ll crash every Christmas party I hear about until I find you again” she confided.

“You'll wear the spanx again too, won’t you? I love pretending!”

After fixing herself back up to prim and proper, she re-entered the gathering hall, waved at doughnut and walked out wearing a contented smile.

Clutched in her hand was a cocktail napkin with information about the next Christmas party she would be crashing, wearing support underwear and a cheap red velvet dress.


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