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Thursday, December 9, 2010

It's cause I'm [insert race/gender/marital status/age here] isn't it?

I can't imagine it's a regional thing so I'm sure you're all familiar with the catch phrase that I'm talking about. I work in a very diverse agency so it flies around here all the time. It's cause I'm white isn't it? It's just because I'm old. She says that cause I'm black. You know what I mean.

Anyway, a weird thing happened to me yesterday. I went to have lunch at one of my favorite places. Unlike a lot of my single twentysomething friends, I don't mind eating alone. I don't cook very much since it's basically just me and I tend to grab meals out fairly often. I know people who will eat in their car just so they don't have to sit alone, but it doesn't bother me. I like being able to run in, eat quickly without making a mess in my car, get a refill and run the rest of my lunch-break errands.

Yesterday was not unlike most days. This particular establishment often has a couple of managers who will walk around the place greeting people, getting refills and taking trays. It was also the same as most days, in that none of the managers spoke to me.

I'm a friendly person. I smile at people, I look around while I'm eating, I like to watch people and interact with children. I really think I'm approachable, but when I eat alone I rarely get spoken to by management. Why is this? Is it because I'm alone? Nope, they talked to the business man over there and offered to get him a refill. It ain't cause I'm white. The place is full of white people and they are talking to all of them. It's not because I'm a woman. They asked that elderly lady if they could take her tray for her. It's not my age because that girl over there with the kid is getting a lot of attention from them.

I'm not exaggerating when I tell you that they spoke to every single person around me. I was sitting alone at a small table in the center of this little area. I dumped my own tray, got my own refill and neither of those managers so much as smiled at me (and I smiled at them). Once I noticed it I was bothered by it. Location and preference mean that I eat there fairly often and both of those managers likely recognize my face as a regular patron. I know that I am young and don't have any children to tend to, but would it hurt to throw a little customer service my way?

Does anyone else run into this? Is it just me? Maybe it really is because I'm white/female/single/twentysomething?


Just Jen said...

Personally, I think it's because you look like a sex goddess. They are scared that you are going to try and take them in the back and have your way with them.

EnVii said...

i like jens comment

Red Shoes said...

Yeah... I like Jen's comment as well... :oD

But you are right... The first week in November, I took a student to a business convention... she had received a scholarship from them, and when she went forward to accept the envelop, she was asked to say a few things about her university experience, etc etc etc... she is a white female... the next recipient from another school was a black male... he was called forward, received his envelop, and I guess he was waiting to be asked about his school experience, and the emcee went to the next recipient. Now, in fairness, he didn't ask any other recipient about his/her school experiences...

I don't think there was any racial or gender bias involved... the process was running by the seat-of-his-pants... It was very awkward. I felt sorry for the young man, and when he came back, I went over and started talking to him about his university, his studies, etc... and I think he felt better.

Sometimes it's just that people don't know any better...


Joe Nobody said...

Maybe they were afraid to approach a single attractive woman. Thinking that you may think they were hitting on you.

D. Scandal said...

I like that even though there are no real pictures of me on here you all inherently know that I am an attractive sex goddess ;)